雅思作文,请高手指导...1. More and more measures are being taken by the government to improve the stagnant economy conditions in the world. Some people believe such a practice is simply waste of money and energy. What is your opinion?Faced wi

雅思作文,请高手指导...1. More and more measures are being taken by the government to improve the stagnant economy conditions in the world. Some people believe such a practice is simply waste of money and energy. What is your opinion?Faced wi
雅思作文,请高手指导...
1. More and more measures are being taken by the government to improve the stagnant economy conditions in the world. Some people believe such a practice is simply waste of money and energy. What is your opinion?
Faced with deterioration of finance crisis, the governments of America, British and European unions provide some measures to assist the world economy, such as providing money to the banks which are confronted with bankrupt and also cutting interest rates in order to restrain economic recession.
Some people believe this practice is simply waste of money and energy. They argue that no matter what government fix, they cannot offset the issue that economy fall into the abyss at the present. It is universally acknowledged that this situation, such as the soaring petrol price, is fatal and significant to our society. More badly some counties cannot afford the debt and becoming insolvent, it means not only citizen but government does not have the way to terminate or constrain the finance crisis. Therefore only provide these measures, cannot government conquer the issue we face with.
However, other people do not think so. They consider that this recession issue will be changed in few mouths because of the policy of the government. Although many people loss their job, cannot afford daily cost and the quantity of society demand is fall, government provide a lot of subsidies to rescue people who live in dangerous. Through this policy, our life becomes hopeful, peaceful and invigorative. Moreover, some counties get together, communicate with each other and decide some crucial ways to control the economy problems.
To sum up, In my own view, not only government but the citizen can do something which influence the economic problems, such as consider greater use of public transport, economize the source and change some behaviour to support the economy develop.
告诉我目前的水平,在帮我点评下我这个文章哪里不好..

雅思作文,请高手指导...1. More and more measures are being taken by the government to improve the stagnant economy conditions in the world. Some people believe such a practice is simply waste of money and energy. What is your opinion?Faced wi
我不知道我这雅思7分的人算不算高手,厚着脸皮接了这个问题……
个人感觉这篇文章大概能得到5.5到6分,我整个给你改一下,你看一下就好.
你的文章中用了很多大词,像insolvent之类的,但是很多句式都用得不是很好.这样给人感觉不协调,就好像这些生僻的词都是查字典查出来的.
像financial crisis这种专业术语,如果不会说,或者不确定的话,请尽量用其他平实的语言代替.错写成finance crisis考官看了会狠狠扣你分的.其他经济学术语我都给你改了,你能记就记住,不能记就算了,可以找些替代词汇.（幸亏我是经济学专业的……要是别的领域,我还真不敢给你改.）
还有就是如果从题干中节取一句话,那就尽量把那句话改得面目全非一点.如果只改一个词就放在文章里,考官可能会认为你是在抄袭.
其他改动的地方你看一下就好.不保证全对,至少尽我力了……
Facing the financial crisis, the governments of U.S.A, British and other European union countries have taken some measures to assist the world economy, for example,providing money to the banks which are confronted with bankrupt and cutting interest rates in order to restrain economic recession.
Some people believe that this practice is merely a waste of money and energy. They argue that no matter what government fix, they can not offset the issue that economy is falling into the abyss at the present. It is universally agreed that this situation, such as the soaring petrol price, is fatal and significant to our society. What is worse, some counties cannot afford the debt and becoming insolvent, it means neither citizens nor governments is able to find the way to terminate or constrain the financial crisis. Therefore providing these measures only cannot help the government to conquer the issue we face with.
However, other people do not think so. They said that this recession issue will be changed in few months because of the government policy. Although many people lost their jobs, failed to afford daily cost and the quantity of society demand has been fallen, governments provide a lot of subsidies to rescue people who live in poverty. Thanks to those policy, our life becomes hopeful, peaceful and invigorative. Moreover, some counties got together, communicated with each other and agreed on some crucial ways to control the economic problems.
To sum up, in my own view, not only governments but also citizens can do something which influence the economic problems, such as making full use of public transport, economizing the sources and changing some behaviour to support the economical development.